D-Katawa Shoujo

WORDS WORDS WORDS


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Sinperhezine
Posts: 1
Joined: Wed Jul 25, 2012 10:08 pm

D-Katawa Shoujo

Post by Sinperhezine »

Foreword

Ok before I start there are a few things I want to point out. For starters I really like Sci-if and fantasy more than anything else. With that said this said this story isn't going to become a fix the X story especially given that the "fixes" at the moment or more akin to medication of today(fix your runny nose in exchange for a runny ass or even better DEATH)

I'm mainly doing this to gain witting experience and plan on writing a story for each of the girls in a similar way, either starting at the mid path or sometime after the ending. I'm also going to shoot to keep a lot of mystery in the air about what is what and how things are possible and while I may finish one story not everything will be explained.
I would also like to point out that I have change Haiso back-story although you're not going to get to that for a while.
So without further ado let start with lily


"Could you two hold on a moment? I just need to..." This can't be good. I stopped dead in my tracks, behind Lilly and Hanako, as sweat started to bead around on my head.
"Is something wrong?" Lily asked. I could see both Hanako and Lily turn around to check on me.
"Nah, I just got pins and needles in... " Another jolt of pain surges through me. I bend over as I grab my chest in some futile attempt to alleviate the pain, only to feel something on my chest. What the hell is it?

"Haiso?" Lily asked, lost in what was going on as Hanako recoiled at the sight of my pain…

"What... what is this." There is something on my chest. It’s small and thin... almost fitting to the contours of my chest, but some part of it felt like it was missing. It’s almost as if it was falling apart.
"What is what?" Lily asked, concern coming over her face as I try to recollect myself.

"I don't know, but it…" Before I can even finish my sentence, I scream out in pain as I fall on my free hand and knees. My hand is on my chest refusing to leave as if to tell me, this thing on my chest is the cause of all of this.
"Hais... AAAAH!" Hanako reacted to my action, on the verge of breaking down herself.

"Haiso!? Hanako, tell me what's going on!" Lily was now panicking, attempting to gain control of the situation, "Hanako, tell me!" She continued in vain as Hanako was paralyzed with fear while I wrestled with my own pain and the curiosity of the device on my chest.

I didn't know what the hell this thing was, and at this point I didn't care. I flopped onto my back as Hanako rushed to my side while Lily tried to hold back her panic from having no clue of how bad my situation was. Both of my hands dive under my shirt and dig into my chest at the top of device. With one hard pull I scream out in pain as I pull the device from my chest and just like that, the pain was gone...
I pause for a moment, as I take note of every... no, more like analyze everything as information started pouring into my head.

"Hais... Haiso! Your eyes are glowing!" shouted a bewildered Hanako. As my eyes glowed it was then that I realized that a HUD was active in my vision. All of the information that was flowing into my head was being displayed before my very eyes! Graphics and diagrams popped in and out of existence, giving read out on my own status and things around me before everything stopped suddenly. Large, bold letters appeared stating, “REBOOT COMPLETE. SYSTEMS ALL GREEN. CYBERNETIC OPERATIONS AT 100%."

"Haiso!" I heard Lily’s familiar voice calling out to me.

"I'm fine Lily." I stated as I realized what happened to me. I took a long hard look at the thing that was attached to my chest. It was thin, a little bigger than a playing card, and it was see-through. The design on the device made it look like some kind of circuit board with pieces of my skin and a little blood on it. Part of the device seems to have worn off either due to time, the elements I exposed my body to, my body itself, or it could just be ripping off of me.
"What is it?" I had completely forgotten that Hanako was right next to me. She was just as curious about it as I was.

"I don't know." I stood up carefully, so as not to take my eyes off of the device as I raised it up to the sun, "But whatever it is... things are about to get a lot more interesting because of it."

"I.... I think we should go back." Lily hesitantly stated. My newly found confidence must have her second guessing herself. To be honest, I would do the same if I was in her shoes. It must be confusing for her to hear me sound so stoic after hearing Hanako practically suffer a nervous breakdown. In truth, maybe I wasn’t as indomitable as I would like to think I was. Aside from the dirt on the back of my shirt, I looked fine on the exterior. But as far as the interior, I knew there was plenty to be worried about... as the wording on my HUD had changed. "SEEK REST... IMMEDIATELY!!!"
Last edited by Sinperhezine on Mon Aug 20, 2012 4:12 am, edited 3 times in total.
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griffon8
Posts: 1116
Joined: Mon Jan 25, 2010 8:47 pm
Location: Southeast Michigan, USA

Re: D-Katawa Shoujo

Post by griffon8 »

Okay, you have a lot of typos. Starting with 'foreword' is one word and his name is Hisao.

Your concept is interesting, so I'd be interested in seeing more. But please get a proofreader.
I found out about Katawa Shoujo through the forums of Misfile. There, I am the editor of Misfiled Dreams.

Completed: 100%, including bonus picture. Shizune>Emi>Lilly>Hanako>Rin

Griffon8's Writing
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