Hanako's Broken Heart Club

[Gandara]

I'm gonna copy pasta a post I made on another forum. I feel it's pertinent to this thread, and hopefully it'll help push a little hope towards some of you.

- - -

To be terribly nerdy, I'm going to quote Samwise Gamgee's quote from the end of The Two Towers (the film, not sure how close it is to the book, if it's in there at all):

Sam: "I know. It's all wrong. By rights we shouldn't even be here. But we are. It's like in the great stories, Mr. Frodo. The ones that really mattered. Full of darkness and danger, they were. And sometimes you didn't want to know the end. Because how could the end be happy? How could the world go back to the way it was when so much bad had happened? But in the end, it's only a passing thing, this shadow. Even darkness must pass. A new day will come. And when the sun shines it will shine out the clearer. Those were the stories that stayed with you. That meant something, even if you were too small to understand why. But I think, Mr. Frodo, I do understand. I know now. Folk in those stories had lots of chances of turning back, only they didn't. They kept going. Because they were holding on to something.
Frodo: "What are we holding onto, Sam?"
Sam: "That there's some good in this world, Mr. Frodo... and it's worth fighting for."

Damn quote makes me misty eyed every time I watch that movie. It's really powerful when you think about it, especially if you apply Frodo and Sam's journey to Mordor as an analogy of your own life. Everyone in this world is on their own path they must follow, and at times it can seem like there's absolutely no hope. But there's always hope, no matter what, as long as you keep moving forward. Keep reaching for your goals, never give up, and you will achieve something great. You may not save Middle Earth from doom and despair, but I guarantee that your life will have a meaningful impact on the world, even if it doesn't ever feel like it... even if you were too small to understand why.

- - -

A fellow on the board I posted this on said that he doesn't have any goals, and that's the problem. If anyone feels like that here, let me help throw some ideas around for "goals", things one can strive for that extend beyond the selfish and self-serving, even though at the end of the day most of these really benefit you just as much as they benefit anyone else:

1) Live your life for your fellow man. This one is multi-faceted and has a lot of ways you can apply it. Examples would include volunteering at a charity / shelter / outreach center, being a good friend to those closest to you and going out of your way to help them in their lives, or just generally being a loving, caring human being. It's absolutely incredible how powerful love is, and I don't mean romantic love - just a longing to build up your neighbor, to help a stranger in a time of need, or do a good deed. It doesn't take a lot. I know a lot of organizations ask for monetary donations and I'm sure plenty of us are in no position to donate our meager funds, but consider donating time. Give a helping hand somewhere, or just spend time with a friend and make sure everything in their life is going well. You never know - even if you don't feel like you can make a change with your time, I bet that good will come from your actions. To the members who have found love, extend this care to your partner. Anyone can find purpose within their own life by building up the world around them, by helping others not just grow but flourish, and by being a good person. Also, it's incredibly contagious. Show kindness to your fellow man and it will be reciprocated, maybe not to you but it will continue.

2) Evaluate your own life and identify things you would like to change, and then START CHANGING THEM. This thread is full of people who are pouring their hearts and souls out to anonymous KS-friends, but recognizing some of the things wrong in our lives is only the first step. Incredibly, this visual novel has caused many, many people to begin making significant changes in their lives, from exercising and getting in shape to taking up new or forgotten hobbies, to coming out of their shells and truly reaching for remedy to their human condition. A major step in achieving this new beginning is by saying "I will" instead of "I might". Pacifism is a dangerous partner, and an easy one to fall into the arms of. To really make changes you have to set realistic goals and actually do work to achieve them. Saying, "I might do this" or "I'll eventually do that" will postpone the change indefinitely.

... There's probably more but I can't write any more right now. If anyone wants to suggest goals people can set for themselves, feel free to chime in.

[Out-All Knight]

Dang, I expected a negative reaction(I'm pessimistic at times) and I've heard that answer many times, its just that I don't know where to start and soon two obstacles fling any motivation in my face.

Right now, I study to become a psychologist as at first I was curious about the subject and because there is no drawing course in my school, with drawing as my hobby.

My only obstacles is the fact I hate myself and I have no discipline. Really, I'm both sour-pessimist inside but I'm also heartfelt optimist in the inside as well (confusing..), The optimist inside of my is stronger due to the fact that good always prevail in the end but the thought of something going wrong does not escape my mind.

and the fact I really have no discipline annoys me to no end... I plan and set goals for myself (making a drawing, studying schoolwork, preparing for the long-term projects,etc) but my slacker and procrastinating self usually(almost) wins, I will develop a disciplined mindset but I don't have a clue where to start.. (Is going about the goal to the end a good start?), I have many great ideas and goals but these get locked up in development hell due to that.

Heh, But screw that, as I will find a way to get past that! but I don't know where to start...

[Beoran]

Myshina and Out-All Knight, thank you for your stories.


Gandara, I understand your setiment, but I'd say it's even simpler to say "Live for yourself." Isn't that selfish? No it isn't. To live for one's self is to look for happiness for one's self. And you'll find that the best way to that is trough self improvement and improvement of your relationship with others. Enlightenment and love, if you like.

Edit:
Out-All Knight, I know, procrastination is also one of my problems. There's no way around it but starting to do whatever it is we have to do. I find that once I get going and have some momentum, I can pull of quite a bit of work.

[Gandara]

"Live for yourself."

This isn't always good enough motivation for people. It's my belief that, by demonstrating a desire to improve your surroundings, you in fact improve your own quality of life greatly.

[Pseudogenesis]

Diet / Exercise Tracker:
Original weight (1/1/12): 400 lbs. // Target weight: 220 lbs. // Current (6/29/12): 354 lbs. // Total lost: 46 lbs. (25.5%)

Bloody hell. I don't mean to derail the thread, but keep the hell on going! Best of luck.

[Helbereth]

Diet / Exercise Tracker:
Original weight (1/1/12): 400 lbs. // Target weight: 220 lbs. // Current (6/29/12): 354 lbs. // Total lost: 46 lbs. (25.5%)

Bloody hell. I don't mean to derail the thread, but keep the hell on going! Best of luck.

I second that. I read that a while ago, but didn't want to derail anything.

Luckily someone did that for me. =)

[Pseudogenesis]

THERE, THREAD'S ALL BETTER

[Kouryuu]

Damn quote makes me misty eyed every time I watch that movie. It's really powerful when you think about it, especially if you apply Frodo and Sam's journey to Mordor as an analogy of your own life. Everyone in this world is on their own path they must follow, and at times it can seem like there's absolutely no hope. But there's always hope, no matter what, as long as you keep moving forward. Keep reaching for your goals, never give up, and you will achieve something great. You may not save Middle Earth from doom and despair, but I guarantee that your life will have a meaningful impact on the world, even if it doesn't ever feel like it... even if you were too small to understand why.

It's so nice to be reminded of this from time to time <3. I really know this well, its the only reason I am still pushing forward in my life. I have a good reason and good inspiration, I cant give up, that wouldnt be fair to those that mean everything to me. Whether they get to see this better me or not is irrelevant, I get to show others what I was shown, which I was too blind to see, before.

A fellow on the board I posted this on said that he doesn't have any goals, and that's the problem. If anyone feels like that here, let me help throw some ideas around for "goals", things one can strive for that extend beyond the selfish and self-serving, even though at the end of the day most of these really benefit you just as much as they benefit anyone else

This is true, I never had any goals in my life (that lasted more than a few weeks if that) until about a year ago. I still have that same goal. I guess its the reason I been able to pull myself out of depression after 8 years, I have incorporated more goals into it and also smaller more achievable goals, like daily or weekly. Sense of accomplishment is a big thing.

I cant really offer any advice on goals, I mean until I found mine I never knew. I guess you just gotta search for something you want to do, make a goal to do it and then make smaller daily/weekly goals that lead to it so you can feel like you are making progress. The quickest way to giving up for me is feeling like I am making no progress.

Gandara, I understand your setiment, but I'd say it's even simpler to say "Live for yourself." Isn't that selfish? No it isn't. To live for one's self is to look for happiness for one's self. And you'll find that the best way to that is trough self improvement and improvement of your relationship with others. Enlightenment and love, if you like.

This is very true. What others do is mostly out of your control and I learnt that you cant worry about things that are out of your control. Similarly you cant worry about what you cant change (like the past). I used to worry/regret a lot about my past and what other people thought/did/would do but at the end of the day you cant do a damn thing about that. So you gotta do whats best for you.

[dwarduk]

I'm similar. No motivation whatsoever, and a huge procrastinator. The only time I get things done is when I 'trick myself' into being really interested in whatever it is, and I find it extremely difficult to do things if I can't get it to catch my interest. Oh well, I've managed to get myself interested in many things over the not-so-many years of my life so far; maybe I'll get better at the 'trick'

[Surreal-mind]

@ Out-All Knight: Thank you for sharing your story.
Keep living your life, and as long as you don't give up, everything should be fine.

@ Micijayah: It was a good story, thanks for sharin it with us.
Your "Lilly" really sounds like a wonderful person.
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about being a good person

I think Gandara's right. I'm not good with words so I'm just gonna quote something Jesee Custer said (or was it his dad ?),
"You got to be one of the good guys, cause there's way too many of the bad."
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Small update on me: Seems like most problems have been solved, so I can relax for a while now.
In a way things are good, and the future is FINALLY looking bright.
I'll post more about it later, if I do it right now I'll end up with a huge wall of text and digressing all the time.

[Micijayah]

It's sad that she had to leave...
But at least you were able to experience love.
And you still have all the beautiful memories, treasure them !

It's as they say I guess, it's better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all...

[yummines]

It's sad that she had to leave...
But at least you were able to experience love.
And you still have all the beautiful memories, treasure them !

It's as they say I guess, it's better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all...

Maybe. I'd prefer not to remember a girl who lied and dumped me and rather not have liked anybody.
Then I might be a little less cynical

[Micijayah]

Maybe. I'd prefer not to remember a girl who lied and dumped me and rather not have liked anybody.
Then I might be a little less cynical

Get the story off your chest if you haven't already, enlighten us. It might even help you become "less cynical".
That's what this thread is for.

[yummines]

Maybe. I'd prefer not to remember a girl who lied and dumped me and rather not have liked anybody.
Then I might be a little less cynical

Get the story off your chest if you haven't already, enlighten us. It might even help you become "less cynical".
That's what this thread is for.

Well i posted in the "Hanako's Broken Heart Club" thread a few times. Essentially i was naiive and got into a bad long distance relationship. She said it was her experiment, yadda yadda.
Doesnt make me sad as much as it makes me infuriated. At her and myself

[Gandara]

Weight loss stuff

Thank you both very much. I'm tracking my activity and methods in the Emi Inspired Running / Workout Thread (the link is actually to my first post there outlining my beginnings and what steps I was taking). If either of you, or anyone else, wants to join in getting in shape, running, push-ups or just getting more active, join in the discussion there. It's a really great group of people!