Hanako's Broken Heart Club

[Xiious]

Xiious, I am ashamed to admit I was reluctant to believe your story. Shows what I know. I don't have much to add that the other HBHC members haven't said better. It's good that you told your story; now some more people, even though we are just internet types, know that wonderful girl existed.

dont be ashamed. its human nature not to believe in something at first.

after all, i was in denial for almost 2 years.

[Alexbond45]

^Above post is me, I thought I was logged in...>.>

While some of you cant cry, I SURE AS HELL CAN. Too much, actually, Im moving slow in Clannad season 2. Slower than the British in WWI

I think if you DIDN'T at least tear up during Clannad, you don't have a SOUL. I was sitting in my little sheet partitioned-off part of the tent in the middle of Afganistan going "MUST. NOT. CRY." since everyone was still in the tent.

Clannad AS was the first piece if fiction to give me the feels. That show.. I cant even listen to Dango Daikazoku without getting hit in the feels.

I just have to say, I somewhat envy the people that cannot cry, but then again, Its not too bad to cry TOO much.

I would rather be a crybaby than be a heartless rock anyday. It's like having to bottle things up, even when you don't want to. I actually treasure the few times I can tear up, it's like a reminder that I have a soul. Not that I think I don't! It just kinda feels that way sometimes.

If you've ever seen seinfeld


Its when George's dad does the serenity now, and the guy from the nuthouse says that it just bottle's it all in. as he says..
"Serenity Now, Insanity Later"




Also, speaking of Guitars, I kinda play something close
I PLAY BASS
(And Viola and Trumpet and French Horn...ect.)

[Xiious]

If you've ever seen seinfeld


Its when George's dad does the serenity now, and the guy from the nuthouse says that it just bottle's it all in. as he says..
"Serenity Now, Insanity Later"

i couldnt not laugh at that

[Gandara]

Gandara, I read your story. It seems you're well on the path to a better life. You're an example for others. I just thought it was a really low thing that your friend did; even if there was a grain of truth in his worries, a true friend would have talked to you about it. It totally wasn't your fault, and it says much more about him than about you.

Thank you. And I know the fault lies with that friend. He's pulled similar stuff to this in the past, though never with this severity or impact. To be honest, I'm at the point now where if he walked up to me this moment and apologized, I would forgive him. Hell, I'd probably even thank him for putting me through something that's caused me to take an about face on my life and strive to repair it. But, I will never be his friend again. That train has sailed.

[Choppin]

As I will take it from another thread.

I just would want a girlfriend like Hanako.
Hmm, generally, because when I was teenager I used to be pretty shy, still I had some friends, I wasn't bullied, but I couldn't talk in publicy or when I was in center of attention I was very embarassed and couldn't say even a word just wait, close me eyes and hope it all ends. I didn't want to meet new people, didn't want to be social. Now it got better, I got pretty asertive and I like who I am, still I only like to spend time with my pack of friends but I have no problems with speaking aloud now, still I like to spend a lot of time alone, thinking, doing my things. I guess reasons were because of my parents, who were very strict, and because I was chubby, I was afraid that people won't listen to me because I look bad, not nice, I totally had lack of confidence. I know how's it to get a panic attack, it's one of the worst things. Well, after High School I lost my weight... surprisngly I even became a model.

Anyway I feel connection with shy people. since I know how's it.
I like this feeling with person is slowly opening to me and I can open to him/her.
I already had a girlfriend, it wasn't so good, but I guess mostly it's because of me, we spent 3 years together. I think I cared too much, I wasn't too open or I waited with sex to engagement(I wanted to be sure, she loves me, and I don't give such important thing to not the right person) oh, yeah, I didn't engage . 20 years old virgin salutes you, yeah for some people it might sounds pathetic, most of my friends did this long time ago, I'm the last one who didn't do it, so they joke a lot about my virginity, I don't really care . I think I just wanted too much to be a white knight. Now I think I could only fall in love with a person like Hanako... or hmm, Lilly. I like to be a protecter, a guy who cares, who wants to make his girlfriend feel needed, safe and warm. This game had a big influence on my mind I guess, because last time if I'm looking for someone interesting, I'm going into library . Maybe someday I will meet my Hanako there.

Still I feel really connected with Hanako, so when I tried to start Lilly route, it was okay for first, but later I literally felt like the story is still going on from my Hanako ending, I just felt like I'm literally cheating on Hanako with her best friend. I felt like a monster, like how could I do it... suddenly I pressed alt+f4, and checked some nice pics of Hanako to make me feel better.
I don't know. I think I couldn't just play in KS for now. I will try a week later, and imagine it's just another Hisao from another Yamaku... Maybe later I will can play other routes, but I doubt.

Well, I think this story fits a little more Hanako's Broken Heart Club.

And I'm sorry for the english. I'm not native english speaker. I wish you all good luck guys, I hope you'll all find your type of girls IRL.

[Gandara]

Choppin:

Thanks for sharing your story / wants (I can see how it would fit into two different threads). Keep searching, and you'll find the right person.

As for the virginity thing, it's not as big of a deal as people make it out to be. The way I see it, you either define yourself one of two ways: sex is a fun, recreational activity to partake in with some amount of leisure, or sex is an extremely important step in the realm of romance and companionship, and a way to bind two people together physically, emotionally and spiritually. These are extremes, and as such there is room for adjustment of views within the two, but all in all these are the two ends of the spectrum. Neither is wrong - there are plenty of people out there who conform to each side - but when virginity is taken into account, it's typically the people who are more open / casual about sex who will tease or mock you for still being a virgin.

I consider myself to be on the "important" side of the spectrum, and as such I am still a virgin at 25. Could I have lost my virginity already? Absolutely, there's bars everywhere and I could go home with some floozy at the tip of a hat. But I've chosen to make it important, and something I want to give to someone who is significant to me.

So, what I'm trying to say is, do what your heart tells you to do. If you want to save it for the right person, then save it. Teasing and jokes are just that - and if all else fails, if one of your friends tells you to lose your virginity, counter by asking what their mother is doing that evening. That usually makes 'em shut up.

[Veilchen]

first of all i have to apologize for any mistakes i might make. i am from austria and even after 10 years english in school i don´t thinkt that this has been enough time for the task: write a simple forum post...

i can´t believe it, but this thread really helped me!

after playing ks i was a little bit depressed and i thought that something was missing in my life. i mean i should have been happy, there wasn´t much to complain about. unlike many people here i have lots of friends, talking in public isn´t a problem for me (don´t know if this is important), i won the basketball championship with my team, i did very well at my exams (a-levels i think it is in english) and not that i want to sound arrogant or something, but i think i look pretty decent (can you say that???). but to find something like hisao did in real life just seemed unrealistic. it made me feel bad because i thought that love should be like it is in ks: you meet a beautiful girl, learn everything about her, help her in bad times and eventually you really fall in love with her. i couldn´t believe that i would ever find something like that and this caused some mental problems. i play piano for 13 years now but after my first playthrough of ks i had problems even with simple parts, i had problems to fall asleep, problems at playing basketball (shooting was really bad during this time) and sometimes even just concentrating on something seemed impossible.

but you guys out there really helped me. after i´ve read some "broken heart" stories i started to feel better. before my first ks-forum visit i wanted to fall in love, i wanted to have a girlfriend. but now that i know how much pain a girl can bring you and how terrible it feels to lose someone close (i´m really sorry for you, hope you will see better times soon!) i´m pretty happy with my life. you guys taught me that it sometimes can be better to be satisfied instead of reaching for the stars. thanks!

ps: some stories here are really sad but i´m sure that everyone of you will see brighter days! i hope you all will find what you are looking for!

[Xiious]

first of all i have to apologize for any mistakes i might make. i am from austria and even after 10 years english in school i don´t thinkt that this has been enough time for the task: write a simple forum post...

i can´t believe it, but this thread really helped me!

after playing ks i was a little bit depressed and i thought that something was missing in my life. i mean i should have been happy, there wasn´t much to complain about. unlike many people here i have lots of friends, talking in public isn´t a problem for me (don´t know if this is important), i won the basketball championship with my team, i did very well at my exams (a-levels i think it is in english) and not that i want to sound arrogant or something, but i think i look pretty decent (can you say that???). but to find something like hisao did in real life just seemed unrealistic. it made me feel bad because i thought that love should be like it is in ks: you meet a beautiful girl, learn everything about her, help her in bad times and eventually you really fall in love with her. i couldn´t believe that i would ever find something like that and this caused some mental problems. i play piano for 13 years now but after my first playthrough of ks i had problems even with simple parts, i had problems to fall asleep, problems at playing basketball (shooting was really bad during this time) and sometimes even just concentrating on something seemed impossible.

but you guys out there really helped me. after i´ve read some "broken heart" stories i started to feel better. before my first ks-forum visit i wanted to fall in love, i wanted to have a girlfriend. but now that i know how much pain a girl can bring you and how terrible it feels to lose someone close (i´m really sorry for you, hope you will see better times soon!) i´m pretty happy with my life. you guys taught me that it sometimes can be better to be satisfied instead of reaching for the stars. thanks!

ps: some stories here are really sad but i´m sure that everyone of you will see brighter days! i hope you all will find what you are looking for!

Thank you for sharing your thoughts. but dont give up on love! someday you'll understand that a relationship sometimes can be TOTALLY worth the pain that can sometimes come with it. there will be bad memories, but never let them get you down! always look forward to better days

[Kutagh]

@Veilchen: No offense intended but basically you're going the Emi route: You're closing yourself off for others just to shield yourself from pain. I'd strongly suggest to really consider this aspect. But yeah, I agree with 'better to be satisfied instead of reaching for the stars': Usually once you got something, you'll be wanting more. Be satisfied with what you have, go with the flow if something changes (but feel free to try to bend the flow a bit). That is how I approach my life as well, I'm satisfied but I wouldn't mind having a good relationship with a girl, someone who wants to really know me and vice versa. But there is no point into it for me to actively search for it, as I know it wouldn't be some girl I met once in a café, it'd be a girl that I meet regularly, someone who I come to know better and better. So I socialize a bit with the people around me and if there is a girl that I'm getting serious about, I'll make a real effort to make it happen if possible.

@Gandara: I have to agree with you about the virginity aspect. Myself, I don't care for sex with someone just for the sex (be it a whore or a 'girlfriend'). And if I had a serious relationship that I wanted, I would prefer sex only when she actually wants the sex, being intimate with me, not as some sacrifice or so to get closer to me (oh and please don't start about Hanako here!). I don't mind she has a healthy sex drive as long as she wants the sex for the sex

[Redbullet612]

Anyways, to wrap up my long ass... whatever this is, I'm now about to start writing one of the girls stories for Stewart-Class 7's visual novel "Chord Progression", which will be my first time in... well ever really, openly submitting my own writing for everyone to read and bitch about. I still get nervous about it, of course. I'm still afraid of people, and honestly even during those two times in my life where I was in front of a crowd, I looked at the floor the whole time shaking. It's just, I was able to focus on my playing instead of them, and that got me through. And that's really the secret for folks like us to get their time in the light I think. Focus 100% on what you're doing, enjoy it. Fuck everything else, and everyone else. Let the world fade away, all that matters is that you're enjoying your work. And if you do enjoy it, it'll be reflected in that work. Yeah, you will get haters, but you'll get people who like it too. If you make it, they will come. Sorry if that was a bit too jumbled, I'm exhausted.

sorry if this is a tad off topic to the thread, i just wanted to say, that is why im not sure about either applying or just following along XD im not even that experienced a writer.

plus, im a guitarist too. >> are you my brother?!

If you're referring to the VN, we're going to try to get the boards up today, or tomorrow latest so we can start talking to people about what we're doing. I'd suggest that you give it a shot and apply though, It's definitely made me feel a lot better, and I haven't even written anything past the sample application story and character info! We actually only need one writer now, too. Need artists bad though. And musicians. And even though there's only a handful of us right now, everyone's really chill and we're all helping eachother out.

It's certainly made me feel better being involved in this over the last few days! Feel free to PM me if you have any questions about it as well. Same goes for all of you guys, I'd be damn honoured to work with any of you and it's shaping up to be a really good experience!

Oh god, I didn't mean to turn this into a recruitment thread.... BACK TO THE TOPIC! ONWARDS! NOTHING TO SEE!

Choppin:

Thanks for sharing your story / wants (I can see how it would fit into two different threads). Keep searching, and you'll find the right person.

As for the virginity thing, it's not as big of a deal as people make it out to be. The way I see it, you either define yourself one of two ways: sex is a fun, recreational activity to partake in with some amount of leisure, or sex is an extremely important step in the realm of romance and companionship, and a way to bind two people together physically, emotionally and spiritually. These are extremes, and as such there is room for adjustment of views within the two, but all in all these are the two ends of the spectrum. Neither is wrong - there are plenty of people out there who conform to each side - but when virginity is taken into account, it's typically the people who are more open / casual about sex who will tease or mock you for still being a virgin.

I consider myself to be on the "important" side of the spectrum, and as such I am still a virgin at 25. Could I have lost my virginity already? Absolutely, there's bars everywhere and I could go home with some floozy at the tip of a hat. But I've chosen to make it important, and something I want to give to someone who is significant to me.

So, what I'm trying to say is, do what your heart tells you to do. If you want to save it for the right person, then save it. Teasing and jokes are just that - and if all else fails, if one of your friends tells you to lose your virginity, counter by asking what their mother is doing that evening. That usually makes 'em shut up.

All of this. I had a tough time through high school with virgin jokes, still do. But my roommate, being my complete opposite, has shown me what the other side is like as well. (No, we have never "done it". We're just friends, you dirty minded people..) She's VERY open with her sex life, not a whore or anything, as she's smart about it and still needs to like the person she see's. But I see what she goes through because of that, and honestly, it's about as bad for her as virgin jokes are to me. Maybe even a bit worse for her, at times, since she always gets involved with assholes who I usually nearly get in fights with, while I just do my own thing. Sure, it's lonely, that's the down side. Loneliness. But I personally would rather be alone now and meet the "special girl" down the road and have that one night be amazing, than go around banging everything in sight because I can. And yeah, I've been hit on quite a few times, but I always turned them down because they weren't what I was looking for. Depression takes me often because of this, though Im feeling awesome today, in a few days I'll fall back into it, then be fine, repeat. But, I think it's worth the wait.

Edit: And yes Xiious, we're brothers in arms. Time for a manly picnic.

[Xiious]

@Veilchen: No offense intended but basically you're going the Emi route: You're closing yourself off for others just to shield yourself from pain. I'd strongly suggest to really consider this aspect. But yeah, I agree with 'better to be satisfied instead of reaching for the stars': Usually once you got something, you'll be wanting more. Be satisfied with what you have, go with the flow if something changes (but feel free to try to bend the flow a bit). That is how I approach my life as well, I'm satisfied but I wouldn't mind having a good relationship with a girl, someone who wants to really know me and vice versa. But there is no point into it for me to actively search for it, as I know it wouldn't be some girl I met once in a café, it'd be a girl that I meet regularly, someone who I come to know better and better. So I socialize a bit with the people around me and if there is a girl that I'm getting serious about, I'll make a real effort to make it happen if possible.

@Gandara: I have to agree with you about the virginity aspect. Myself, I don't care for sex with someone just for the sex (be it a whore or a 'girlfriend'). And if I had a serious relationship that I wanted, I would prefer sex only when she actually wants the sex, being intimate with me, not as some sacrifice or so to get closer to me (oh and please don't start about Hanako here!). I don't mind she has a healthy sex drive as long as she wants the sex for the sex

changing the topic back,
i agree with you here

[Walrusfella]

I already had a girlfriend, it wasn't so good, but I guess mostly it's because of me, we spent 3 years together. I think I cared too much, I wasn't too open or I waited with sex to engagement(I wanted to be sure, she loves me, and I don't give such important thing to not the right person) oh, yeah, I didn't engage . 20 years old virgin salutes you, yeah for some people it might sounds pathetic, most of my friends did this long time ago, I'm the last one who didn't do it, so they joke a lot about my virginity, I don't really care . I think I just wanted too much to be a white knight. Now I think I could only fall in love with a person like Hanako... or hmm, Lilly. I like to be a protecter, a guy who cares, who wants to make his girlfriend feel needed, safe and warm. This game had a big influence on my mind I guess, because last time if I'm looking for someone interesting, I'm going into library . Maybe someday I will meet my Hanako there.

Don't worry at all about the virginity/age thing. Gandara and Redbullet612 have it exactly right; sex is a big deal for people like us. It isn't just a meaningless bit of fun like we are constantly being told. Lose your virginity with someone you love, or at least like a lot. I lost mine at 19, and I was glad I didn't have a long history with a bunch of girls I didn't care about.

Please try the other paths in KS again after a little while. Hanako will be alright. It isn't Hisao's job to save any of them; she saves Hisao more than the other way around. She'll probably remain your favourite, however. She did for me.

[Total Destruction]

I already had a girlfriend, it wasn't so good, but I guess mostly it's because of me, we spent 3 years together. I think I cared too much, I wasn't too open or I waited with sex to engagement(I wanted to be sure, she loves me, and I don't give such important thing to not the right person) oh, yeah, I didn't engage . 20 years old virgin salutes you, yeah for some people it might sounds pathetic, most of my friends did this long time ago, I'm the last one who didn't do it, so they joke a lot about my virginity, I don't really care . I think I just wanted too much to be a white knight. Now I think I could only fall in love with a person like Hanako... or hmm, Lilly. I like to be a protecter, a guy who cares, who wants to make his girlfriend feel needed, safe and warm. This game had a big influence on my mind I guess, because last time if I'm looking for someone interesting, I'm going into library . Maybe someday I will meet my Hanako there.

Don't worry at all about the virginity/age thing. Gandara and Redbullet612 have it exactly right; sex is a big deal for people like us. It isn't just a meaningless bit of fun like we are constantly being told. Lose your virginity with someone you love, or at least like a lot. I lost mine at 19, and I was glad I didn't have a long history with a bunch of girls I didn't care about.

You and I must be the same guy. Late bloomer, quick to make up for lost time with chicks that (mostly) matter, hahah.

Sex is whatever. Don't put it on a pedestal. It's something just like anything: the first time is gonna be sloppy and terrifying, but then you practice, get better, and all is good. Don't sweat the technique.

[ArazelEternal]

As I will take it from another thread.

I just would want a girlfriend like Hanako.
Hmm, generally, because when I was teenager I used to be pretty shy, still I had some friends, I wasn't bullied, but I couldn't talk in publicy or when I was in center of attention I was very embarassed and couldn't say even a word just wait, close me eyes and hope it all ends. I didn't want to meet new people, didn't want to be social. Now it got better, I got pretty asertive and I like who I am, still I only like to spend time with my pack of friends but I have no problems with speaking aloud now, still I like to spend a lot of time alone, thinking, doing my things. I guess reasons were because of my parents, who were very strict, and because I was chubby, I was afraid that people won't listen to me because I look bad, not nice, I totally had lack of confidence. I know how's it to get a panic attack, it's one of the worst things. Well, after High School I lost my weight... surprisngly I even became a model.

Anyway I feel connection with shy people. since I know how's it.
I like this feeling with person is slowly opening to me and I can open to him/her.
I already had a girlfriend, it wasn't so good, but I guess mostly it's because of me, we spent 3 years together. I think I cared too much, I wasn't too open or I waited with sex to engagement(I wanted to be sure, she loves me, and I don't give such important thing to not the right person) oh, yeah, I didn't engage . 20 years old virgin salutes you, yeah for some people it might sounds pathetic, most of my friends did this long time ago, I'm the last one who didn't do it, so they joke a lot about my virginity, I don't really care . I think I just wanted too much to be a white knight. Now I think I could only fall in love with a person like Hanako... or hmm, Lilly. I like to be a protecter, a guy who cares, who wants to make his girlfriend feel needed, safe and warm. This game had a big influence on my mind I guess, because last time if I'm looking for someone interesting, I'm going into library . Maybe someday I will meet my Hanako there.

Still I feel really connected with Hanako, so when I tried to start Lilly route, it was okay for first, but later I literally felt like the story is still going on from my Hanako ending, I just felt like I'm literally cheating on Hanako with her best friend. I felt like a monster, like how could I do it... suddenly I pressed alt+f4, and checked some nice pics of Hanako to make me feel better.
I don't know. I think I couldn't just play in KS for now. I will try a week later, and imagine it's just another Hisao from another Yamaku... Maybe later I will can play other routes, but I doubt.

Well, I think this story fits a little more Hanako's Broken Heart Club.

And I'm sorry for the english. I'm not native english speaker. I wish you all good luck guys, I hope you'll all find your type of girls IRL.

Id love a girlfriend like Hanako as well. I know how it is to be shy. I am shy myself. I dont like being in large crowds, or being the center of attention. Im good one on one, but more than that and I lock up and dont say much of anything, though I am listening just as intently. Unfortunately, being the shy one has cost me a few friends becasue they dont like how I "shut down".

Dont worry about the virginity thing. Your talking to a 26 year old virgin here. Ive had many a chance to lose it, but I am still waiting for that special person. My Hanako or Lilly. In my high school all the cool kids lost it the first chance they had. I didnt want to be like that. I want to make sure I lose it to a special person who will appreciate it. Even if in the end we dont work out, at least I will know that I didnt just throw it away like a useless commodity. Do not let anyone get you down about it. My reply to any smartass comments would be "At least I can remember the names of all my partners." Im proud that Ive kept my virginity this long. You should be proud of yourself as well.

[Xerxes]

I second what you said, and I'm only a couple of years younger. Love and sex it's a big deal for me, but not in the way that other want me to believe, but quite the opposite, I'm saving that moment for a special person, I don't like the idea of a causual girl just for the sake of getting laid. A lot of people like that lifestyle of casual sex, I may respect them but I'm not like them.
I usually tend to avoid this subject in public, but I don't fear in admiting that I'm virgin. I'm very aprehensive, I can even give a hug or get hugged with anybody without feeling a little awkward, sometimes I feel that it hurts, making me feeling even worse, brittle. Even a hug for me is a special thing, this also includes the manly bro-hugs.

So, don't be ashame for what you are, and only change when you really feel like you need it. Don't let them call you a loser, answerd them: I haven't tried my luck yet, so I you say that I lost in a game that I haven't played yet.

And when our parents say that: It's not normal at your age that you are still a virgin or don't have any friends, you have problems mah boi/grrl.
I'll answer them: I can't participate in social relationships when everybody around me is crazy, or histrionic, or lack any solid social values. They have problems and I'll never admit it, instead they are the ones that think that I'm weird or have problems. I'm just too serene to be among most people, just because I don't follow what the idiot box or the current social trends suggest me to do.